My Trial
Leviticus 19:18" 'Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD. Zechariah 8:17 do not plot evil against your neighbor, and do not love to swear falsely. I hate all this," declares the LORD. Matthew 22:35-40 35Then one of them, which was a lawyer, asked him a question, tempting him, and saying, 36Master, which is the great commandment in the law? 37Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. 38This is the first and great commandment. 39And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. 40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.
When we are not loving God with all our hearts and our relationship with God is not right, we will not be obeying the two greatest commandments given to us. You will notice that if your relationship with God is not where it should be, other relationships in your life won’t be either. If there is something between you and God, a sin, anger, rebellion it will affect every area of your life including other relationships.
God definitely showed this to me through a trial in my life. I would like to share with you what God has been showing me.
When a trial comes along we can look at it and seek God and what He is doing or we can become angry and seek our own understanding. On April 3rd I found out I was pregnant and on April 6th, I went to the doctor to confirm and an ultrasound was performed. I was 6 weeks and 5 days. And when I saw the heartbeat on the ultrasound and what was growing inside of me, a joy filled my soul like I had never felt before. I saw God’s miracle inside of me and I couldn’t wait to call my husband and share my joy with him. I got his voice mail and left him a message. He said the message was so full of joy he just had to keep the message. My parents were excited. First grandbaby. My dad said this filled a void for him. He has always wanted grandchildren. My sister was already trying to name the baby and asking if she could keep the baby for weekends. The list goes on…and on.
On May 6th the doctor went to hear the heartbeat and couldn’t hear one. Although he felt confident all was okay at this stage, something inside of me told me things were not okay. I asked the doctor for an ultrasound. The ultrasound confirmed that there was not a heartbeat and I would have to have surgery the next day. The sadness of the loss isn’t something you can understand unless you have gone through it. But after the sadness came anger. And boy did anger set in. I asked God why? I became angry with God because I couldn’t understand why He had me experience this wonderful gift only for Him to take it away. I just couldn’t for the life of me understand the point of it all. I have to say, I became very angry with God and it began to affect everything in my life.
At church that same week a lady began speaking about the miracles she is seeing through their missions overseas on childbirth. The miracles God was performing. I thought, what about the miracle He had given me? I got up during her testimony and left the room. Why was God having me at this church listening to this? It was very hard and I wanted to scream. I was beginning to realize that my anger towards God was causing me to have anger towards people. It was hard going to the doctor’s office seeing all the expecting mothers. Fighting back the tears for 2.5 hours because they were running behind. I also questioned God then…why 2.5 hours late? I felt very betrayed by God. I did.
I began to realize that I was heading down a road of destruction and began to wonder if God would even forgive me if I had asked. And I knew that my relationship with Christ was affecting every relationship I had. And when you become angry with God and when your heart becomes bitter, your love for His people and yourself will diminish and hate and anger will take over and destroy you. If we begin to see our relationships w/people take a turn for the worst, we need to look at our relationship with Christ, because something isn’t right in your relationship with Him. The two go hand in hand.
My prayer for us today: God please help us to lean not on our own understanding but on every Word You have given us. Please forgive us for trying to lean on our understanding. Please help us to look to you in times of trial and to not turn away. Shows us what we are to learn and what we are to share with other’s in their times of need. Take away our pride. Lord, help us to keep our hearts right with You. We need You Lord and we need the body of Christ. Please show us how to love one another. Please forgive us our sins, cleanse our hearts Lord. It is in Your Holy Name we pray. Amen.
Tammy
When we are not loving God with all our hearts and our relationship with God is not right, we will not be obeying the two greatest commandments given to us. You will notice that if your relationship with God is not where it should be, other relationships in your life won’t be either. If there is something between you and God, a sin, anger, rebellion it will affect every area of your life including other relationships.
God definitely showed this to me through a trial in my life. I would like to share with you what God has been showing me.
When a trial comes along we can look at it and seek God and what He is doing or we can become angry and seek our own understanding. On April 3rd I found out I was pregnant and on April 6th, I went to the doctor to confirm and an ultrasound was performed. I was 6 weeks and 5 days. And when I saw the heartbeat on the ultrasound and what was growing inside of me, a joy filled my soul like I had never felt before. I saw God’s miracle inside of me and I couldn’t wait to call my husband and share my joy with him. I got his voice mail and left him a message. He said the message was so full of joy he just had to keep the message. My parents were excited. First grandbaby. My dad said this filled a void for him. He has always wanted grandchildren. My sister was already trying to name the baby and asking if she could keep the baby for weekends. The list goes on…and on.
On May 6th the doctor went to hear the heartbeat and couldn’t hear one. Although he felt confident all was okay at this stage, something inside of me told me things were not okay. I asked the doctor for an ultrasound. The ultrasound confirmed that there was not a heartbeat and I would have to have surgery the next day. The sadness of the loss isn’t something you can understand unless you have gone through it. But after the sadness came anger. And boy did anger set in. I asked God why? I became angry with God because I couldn’t understand why He had me experience this wonderful gift only for Him to take it away. I just couldn’t for the life of me understand the point of it all. I have to say, I became very angry with God and it began to affect everything in my life.
At church that same week a lady began speaking about the miracles she is seeing through their missions overseas on childbirth. The miracles God was performing. I thought, what about the miracle He had given me? I got up during her testimony and left the room. Why was God having me at this church listening to this? It was very hard and I wanted to scream. I was beginning to realize that my anger towards God was causing me to have anger towards people. It was hard going to the doctor’s office seeing all the expecting mothers. Fighting back the tears for 2.5 hours because they were running behind. I also questioned God then…why 2.5 hours late? I felt very betrayed by God. I did.
I began to realize that I was heading down a road of destruction and began to wonder if God would even forgive me if I had asked. And I knew that my relationship with Christ was affecting every relationship I had. And when you become angry with God and when your heart becomes bitter, your love for His people and yourself will diminish and hate and anger will take over and destroy you. If we begin to see our relationships w/people take a turn for the worst, we need to look at our relationship with Christ, because something isn’t right in your relationship with Him. The two go hand in hand.
My prayer for us today: God please help us to lean not on our own understanding but on every Word You have given us. Please forgive us for trying to lean on our understanding. Please help us to look to you in times of trial and to not turn away. Shows us what we are to learn and what we are to share with other’s in their times of need. Take away our pride. Lord, help us to keep our hearts right with You. We need You Lord and we need the body of Christ. Please show us how to love one another. Please forgive us our sins, cleanse our hearts Lord. It is in Your Holy Name we pray. Amen.
Tammy
posted by BreadBakers at 12:11 PM
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